He never got to see a monkey doing the Macarena on You Tube, nor did he ever wear Keen Sandals – but Charles Darwin did achieve a bit in his time…

Charles Darwin knew a fair bit about very large tortoises, growing stupendous beards, and appearing on ten pound notes – however thanks to a couple of hundred years which it must be noted brought about some major advances in beard trimming – he never knew a thing about Keen Sandals.

This saddens me more than the fact that he wasn’t made a Sir by the British establishment and indeed the fact that he didn’t get to witness evolution taking the form of a monkey doing the Macarena on You Tube (a real shame).

But when you consider that Keen Sandals are the very crux of evolution in footwear, Charles Darwin is surely their intrigued personification slash posthumous spokesperson.

To an expert geologist come adventurer, explorer, evolutionary revolutionary and facial foliage farer like Mr Darwin – Keen Sandals would have been a total revelation compared to the shoes of his day. Indeed in this sense Keen Sandals might well have provided this wisped wanderer with a few more ideas. Perhaps the theory of evolution would have leapt to him a little more quickly if he’d worn a pair while he sailed around the globe on HMS Beagle?

When you’re traversing the seas, observing new lands and generally exploring the world to the max like old C to the D did, you need footwear that is light, comfortable, protects the toes and allows you to walk, climb, stand and generally live comfortably.

On a trip like Darwin’s voyage on the HMS Beagle which lasted no less than five years and where he visited the Cape Verde’s, Brazil, Peru, The Galapagos, Australia and South Africa – you face various challenges which when attempted while wearing 19th century leather clodhoppers is made all the more difficult.

Mr Darwin as we all know was well ahead of his time. He bore the name Darwin long before the dusty Northern Territory town, he detested slavery, he brought about the theory that would test creationism – if he was alive nowadays he would not only be targeted by some very literal bible bashers from a certain none too slender belt in America (no surprises there) but he would certainly be open to new things and would probably have given Keen Sandals a massive thumbs up!

Setting out in 1831, on what even in modern times would be a hugely life changing experience, his job would have been made infinitely easier if he’d worn Keen Shoes.

Admittedly they would have helped little with his seasickness, but for all other of his challenges – they would have been of more assistance to him than Waylon Smithers is Monty Burns.

Charles Darwin once famously said of his visit to Sydney.

‘In the evening I walked through the town, and returned full of admiration at the whole scene. It is a most magnificent testimony to the power of the British nation… My first feeling was to congratulate myself that I was born an Englishman.’

I think he would say the same of Keen Sandals if indeed they were English or he’d worn them on his journey.

There are many people like Charles Darwin who have done a lot to further the knowledge of the human race under testing conditions, but there is no other shoe producer to yet conceive adventure footwear to rival Keen Sandals.

So good on you Chuck – and remember should reincarnation exist and nature select you for the return journey – Keen Sandals are the evolutionary equivalent of the monkey doing the Macarena!

The world’s most hapless adventure story would have to have happened in Australia and it would of course have to feature an Irishman – but would the epic tale of Robert O’Hara Burke and William John Wills have been such a barnstorming failure if they had been wearing Keen sandals?

Keen sandals

Two things are certain, they would probably have fared a hell of a lot better than they did, and they would have been left with some pretty interesting sun tan lines on their feet.
Few of us from the motherland would be aware of this most ill considered mission into the depths of the Australian continent but the story of Burke and Wills is so well ingrained into the Australian national psyche, it is like that of Ned Kelly or dare I say it… Alf Stewart.

You see back when Melbourne was one of the most important cities of the British Empire its isolation from a communications route was a major problem.
To solve this problem, it was necessary to find a cross continent route between Melbourne and the Gulf of Carpentaria to hasten the doltish pace of communications with London. An exploration committee was established and Robert O’Hara Burke, Irish born with no knowledge of bushcraft, chosen as the leader of the mission.

Just to highlight how unutterably badly organised the expedition led by Burke and Wills was, let me explain a bit about what the explorers deemed it necessary to take along with them…
Of the twenty tons of equipment the nineteen man party set out with, which included a dining table, twelve dandruff brushes, four enema kits and a Chinese gong – the exploration team decided not to take fresh meat – which could walk – deciding instead to experiment with dried meat which resulted in them needing no less than three extra rather slow moving wagons.
It took Burke longer than a month to realise that he could spread the weight by making use of the camels – which until then hadn’t so much as felt the weight of a straw on their backs.

The whole mission was a catastrophe from start to finish. Only one man from the whole expedition actually crossed the continent and returned alive to Melbourne thanks to some friendly Aborigines. The rest never had a hope.
Even if the men had known about Keen sandals, they would almost certainly have stubbornly chosen to go on this most gruelling of journey’s wearing what had probably at the time been certified as the least comfortable boots in the world.
So how might Keen Shoes
have helped Burke, Wills and their entourage of hapless pioneers?
Well.
Keen sandals would have kept their feet cool and provided protection and grip for when the going got tough. They are also extremely comfortable, light and designed to be able to traverse land and water – compared to rigid leather boots they would have been a revelation and probably the explorers would have made it further than the outskirts of Melbourne by the end of the first day.
While Keen sandals might have helped – the going of the Australian interior would have been a challenge even by modern highly equipped standards, so in no way should the bravery and single mindedness of these men ever be questioned.
Keen sandals would be today’s choice, certainly if I was to replicate the journey – but one thing should be said – whatever your shoes, it is the wearer that takes them on the adventure!
For me Keen sandals simply make success more accomplishable. So where will you take yours?